What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
