I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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