you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
