forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I could fuck to npr.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Pants are for mortals
Randomize
