I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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