In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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