How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
