no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I could fuck to npr.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
