But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I just had sex on a roof
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Randomize
