This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
