dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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