ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
