im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
