I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
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just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
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I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.