Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
