idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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