that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize