I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
