Dual....:-)
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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