watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.