Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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