I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
even my farts smell like vagina
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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