i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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