Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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