i think my mom watched the whole time
In America we eat man semen.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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