I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize