We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Randomize
