What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
