I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
