guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize