Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
