Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Randomize
