We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
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i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
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he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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