stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
