i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize