You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
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I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
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I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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