im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did angry sex become our thing?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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