so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
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