I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
