you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
