just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
third nipple confirmed
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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