so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize