Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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