I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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