yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
