her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
