New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
