No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
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She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
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I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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