She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
