We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Randomize
