Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize